Make no mistake, we've seen some fairly boneheaded moves made by technologically-illiterate bank robbers, but the latest case involves a fellow who was quite the opposite of that. Yes, the 20 to 25 year male who decided to hold up an Alabama bank the day before his taxes were due actually did the deed without hanging up his cellphone. And there's surveillance footage to prove it. Quite honestly, we can't imagine what the conversation here would've been like, but at least he made the most of whatever minutes he had remaining as a free man, right?

[Via textually]

Rest assured, we've seen some brainless criminals in our day, but this one ranks pretty high on the list. Reportedly, a (potentially inebriated) individual waltzed into a police station and frantically announced that his phone had been stolen at gunpoint. When the detective called the number of the phone reportedly stolen, however, a ring was heard from the "victim's" pocket. After pondering what the criminal hoped to gain from the situation, we here at Engadget HQ came up empty, and apparently, the police involved in the situation were equally stumped -- so stumped, in fact, that they issued a statement entitled "Dumbest criminal?" with details of the event in a local newspaper. We'd say that sums it up fairly accurately.

[Image courtesy of FOTW, thanks LordFarkward]

At first listen, one may assume that leaping onto subway tracks for an iPhone is completely and utterly insane, and while we'd tend to agree, it's not like we haven't seen folks do similarly zany things in the heat of the moment. Reportedly, a vacationer in New York recently dropped his iPhone down onto the subway tracks while shuttling back home, and after realizing his dear mobile was missing and backtracking quite a ways, his pal finally spotted it down below. As you can probably imagine, the crazed owner leaped down, snagged the scratched up (but still fully functional) device and managed to climb back out unscathed. Granted, we can only imagine how painful it would be to drop even more dough on yet another iPhone when all that stands between you and your current one is a leap of faith, but we'd probably just ask one of those friendly MTA employees to help us out before going mano a mano with the Reaper.

[Via Switched]

No, your eyes are not deceiving you. Pictured above (and after the break, for the courageous) is the inexplicably ugly Rocket Phone all dressed up in white. We know you want one, but for your own good, just pretend it's not for sale.

If a burglar with exquisite taste somehow managed to snag a million dollar Goldvish, asking for just $185,000 for its safe return wouldn't be too far-fetched. Apparently, the mobile in question wasn't of the princely variety, as this particular thief managed to lower his asking price to a rock-bottom $200. The suspect, known initially through police paperwork as "Baby Boy," was lured into a trap after police tagged along for the exchange and arrested him at gunpoint. When Mr. Boy (later found to be Randy-Jay Adolphos Jones, which is only slightly better) was questioned, he just couldn't put a finger on why he blurted out the $185k figure versus something more reasonable, but hey, not everyone can be right on top of current market conditions, right?

[Via The Raw Feed]

Yeah, we've certainly seen wallpapers with a touch more satire built in, but there's just something eldritch about seeing an iPhone on itself. Be a clever joke or simply a sign of obsession, it's intriguing nonetheless. Now, if only the pictured icons could be hacked to work within the photo...

It's no secret that some wily individuals will look high and low for loopholes to escape a wireless contract, but staging your own death in order to bypass a $175 early termination fee is admittedly extreme. Nevertheless, a frustrated and determined Verizon customer decided to do just that after the carrier refused to let him out of his contract. Insistent that a host of dropped calls and "string of defective cellphones" were reason enough to ditch The Network, he went so far as to "fashion a fake death certificate" and convinced a friend to fax it in. Unfortunately, Verizon caught on to the scheme and yet again refused to let Mr. Taylor out, so as you can probably guess, the perturbed ex-customer begrudgingly coughed up the dough, trashed his phone, and hoped that he "sent a definite message about how much people hate being strapped to a cellphone that doesn't work."

[Via Pocket-Lint]

There's no denying that we were fairly taken aback by the beauty of the iPhone's screen, but leave it to a clever (and likely bitter) N95 owner to trump Apple's best shot with his very Nokia. While not nearly as ingenious as converting the device into a mapmaker, this crude demonstration explains how to increase the screen real estate linked to the N95 if you're willing to sacrifice your left (or right) arm. Granted, the "hack" did begin with a broken N95, so strapping a portable TV onto one's forearm and utilizing the device's video output was about the only real solution within arm's reach (ahem). Like it or not, it's laced in utility, and you can catch a video of the action after the jump.

[Thanks, Eirikso]

Sure, it's fair game to cram extra features into PDAs, but stuffing a "removable cellphone" into a personal digital assistant's hidden compartment isn't likely to go over well in this millennium. Nevertheless, a hopeful patent filing spills the deets concerning a comical device that apparently disregards the handsets we so often refer to as smartphones, as it describes a diminutive dedicated cellphone that clips into a PDA when not needed. Additionally, the mystical concept allows each device to sync information with one another, and claims to be a "do-it-all" machine that curiously requires two separate devices to pull it all off. Of course, the only obvious perks here are the ability the downsize and carry along just the mobile while your nagging relative enjoys a few of your MP3s on the PDA side, but considering the blossoming market of true all-in-one conglomerates, we don't see this one moving one inch past the paperwork. [Warning: PDF read link]

[Via Textually]

We've heard of quite a few oddities taking place across the lake, but this one has to be considered amongst the most outlandish of all. Apparently, a British fellow who couldn't get a random phone number out of his head following a presumably potent dream decided to text the number and inquire if he had met the person the night prior. As these things always do, one thing led to another, and eventually the two ended up meeting, and as fate would have it, they fell head over heels in love. Aside from the sap, the couple actually went so far as to get married and flee to Goa for their honeymoon after "a long courtship." Let us be the first to say "congrats" to Mr. Brown, but you should be aware that the DVR is no longer under your control, and choosing your iPod over the lady could evidently lead to some seriously dirty looks.

[Via Fark]

You should already know that the Grand Canyon State isn't exactly kosher with rampant tailgating, so actually ramming someone's vehicle due to a personal conflict you have with them isn't likely to get you a whole lot of mercy. Subsequently, a 58-year old male is facing jail time due to his inability to turn the other cheek when he drove up on another motorist who was casually yapping on their cellphone. Rather than simply signing to hang up or doing nothing at all, Mr. Asselin felt it was in both of their best interests if they had a verbal exchange whilst cruising down the avenue, and to make matters worse, the curiously enraged driver reportedly ran the talker into oncoming traffic where the cellphone-using victim narrowly escaped death. Notably, several witnessed deemed the whole event akin to something we'd see "in a movie," but unless you've got Transporter-like skills, we wouldn't recommend trying to reenact this in your home state, no matter your feelings on driving while connected.

[Via Fark]

It's no surprise to hear of someone using mobile / wireless technology to their advantage, and in the latest case of cleverness slapped down by the law, a scandalous Indian chess player was banned for a solid decade in order to "send a message" about how serious they took his act. Umakant Sharma had reportedly logged rating points at an alarming pace in the last 18 months of play, and even qualified for the national championship. But alas, racking up such insane numbers was bound to attract an investigation, and it was discovered that Sharma had been communicating to outside accomplices via a mobile handset and a miniscule Bluetooth earpiece stitched inside a cloth cap, which allowed an external computer to direct his each and every move. While we fully understand the wrongness of such a ploy, we can't deny the humor in envisioning seasoned chess players becoming enraged at their sudden misfortunes, but we'd highly recommend ditching the headgear (and any devious thoughts) before entering a tournament yourself.

Sure, time is money, and nobody has time to wait around to make a phone call, but two parents in Lone Grove, Oklahoma are exemplifying the bounds of being impatient by filing larceny charges against a high school principal and superintendent. Based on an estranged rule that we seriously hope isn't widespread, students are not allowed to have any sort of "wireless telecommunications device" on their person during school hours, and when a cavalier student's mobile rang in the midst of class, it got snatched -- for five days. Based on the "school handbook," officials have the right to confiscate cellphones for a full business week if a student dares to bring one on campus, and reports explain that the superintendent has no inkling to return the device a moment too early. While we can understand how hopeless the poor child must feel without his connection to, well, everything, we're hoping the charges lead to fewer restrictions at Lone Grove High School (and beyond) for everyone's sake, right kids?

[Via Fark]